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October 07, 2007
Feminist twit of the Week
Ok, maybe the first two words are redundant, but it's the deja vu all over again that's got me cranky. So let me nominate Kate Mulvey for twit of the week. In an article rife with barely warmed over 70's retro-angst, she comes up with this irony-berift statement:
Having grown up with successful women such as Margaret Thatcher and Madonna as role models, and with popular culture awash with fantasies of all-powerful women, from Lara Croft to Buffy the Vampire Slayer, men are not so uncomfortable with the woman in control. This value system recognises the trend of female supremacy, which while not as yet the norm seems to be pointing the way for future relationships.
Having come of age in the midst of the 70's feminism and seeing the same navel lint-picking continue to this day on ostensible feminist blogs ("oh my, can I wear lipgloss and still be an authentic feminist?"), I see Kate as nothing more than the stereotyped-chauvanist male in drag. How so?
Because a good deal of the 'feminist' movement is about identifying the "male role", co-opting it, then declaring anything outside of it as lesser than -- or beta.
Take Kate's opening lament:
Last week I went to dinner with an eligible doctor. As we were finishing the main course, I struck up conversation with the owner (Marco) in Italian – I speak five languages. My date nearly choked on his linguini and spent the rest of the date mute. I had committed the worst dating faux pas: I had outshone my suitor.
Not once does it occur to obviously superior Kate that maybe her date was less put-off by her shininess than by her rude behavior in carrying on a conversation that deliberately and publicly excluded him.
Yet it would seem I am not the only woman who is wondering whether it is time to hang up her brain and turn into a Stepford Datee. In America research shows successful young women are hiding their accomplishments for fear that their academic achievements and financial kudos will scare off potential suitors.
Ah! Straw-choice .... check. Claim of "studies show" with no sourcing .... check
Kate, like many an older (yet not wiser) feminist before her frames relationships as conflict
Self-help guides exhort us to flatter the male ego; don’t talk too much and let him make all the jokes if you want him to like you. Well I would rather skewer my eyes out than change my personality.So what is the answer? Someone has to surrender in the sex war.
and then points out what a superior female must do
The second-generation feminists – that is, women in their twenties and thirties – have found a new way to solve the alpha-beta paradox. [...] They map out their life plans early: rise to the top of their chosen career, get the smart house, the cute kids and curl up in bed with a loving beta male. [...]For young women this shift in economic power has given them new choices. But what about the men? While it is true that many older men seem stuck with the “man as success object, woman as sex object” idea and would never contemplate marrying a ball-breaking alpha earner, men in their twenties and thirties seem to be redefining masculinity.
Kate's relationship cluelessness does again reveal what passes for enlightened thinking on the left side of the aisle. These are the people, males and womyn, who write/cajole/lecture us lesser beings on "equality" and "tolerance" yet will immediately use whatever "beta" activities we are engaged in as "proof" of our inferiority.
Kate is the flipside of her feminist sisters who eschew marriage altogether as an institution of The Patriarchy(tm) and celebrate any news of its [longed for] demise. Kate wants a mate, not a partner. She wants to be celebrated as a ball-busting alpha and have a beta pet to serve her needs. What makes for a truly successful relationship eludes her.
But that would take maturity and the wisdom that hopefully accompanies it.
A virtue sorely lacking in the left-feminist movement.
Posted by Darleen at October 7, 2007 03:40 PM
Comments
Hmm, maybe I'll read a little Jane Austen. Help me figure out what the ladies are saying these days.
Posted by: Carl W. Goss at October 7, 2007 05:20 PM
Oh people! We're all basically the same. We just are.
Posted by: Erin at October 15, 2007 08:58 AM