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October 06, 2004
Adventures in Parenting -- Was THAT in the fine print?
Even for those of us who plan to be parents, who give it a lot of thought and preparation, there are just those things you don't plan on. And it's not just realizing that the responsibility of another human being's life is in your hands ... yours, the person who forgets where she parks while at the grocery store and probably has dozens of scotch tape dispensers stashed about the house because each time she needs one, it's never there (necessitating yet another run to the store to buy a new one). You bear this responsibility with the thought that sometime in the future, if you can raise a halfway decent and loving human being, you can launch them and worry no more.
HAH!
I'm very proud of my daughter, Heather. She's bright, funny, cute, sharp and hard working.
And they are going to put me in a home because of her.
Not long ago this sunny little creature came home and announced her latest plan for adventure.
Skydiving.
(Lord, protect us.)
After picking myself up off the floor and resisting an urge to immediately lock her in a closet until the insanity passed, all I could do was stare at her and croak, "Why?"
"Because it'll be fun. It'll be cool."
Show of hands now, how many have small children? Get used to that answer. "Fun" or "cool" or some combination will be offered up each time your children want to do an activity where you immediately start visualizing their broken, maimed, dead bodies.
My parents, her grandparents, were here for dinner the week before her jump. I saw my own face in my mom's pole-axed expression. My dad?
"Cool!"
Ok. I don't get it. I just don't see the thrill in flinging myself out of an airplane. My dad actually chose to do it, having been a paratrooper with the Army 11th Airborne. He was grinning ear-to-ear when talking with Heather.
Heather started snow skiing when she was seven and she was fearless on the slopes. That girl had springs for legs. She showed the same fearlessness as a soccer player starting at about the same age and continuing through high school. When she was 19 she went off to Las Vegas with a group of friends and bungee jumped from one of the hotels. When she saved up enough of her money buy a sensible used car, she used the money for a down payment on a Mustang. The last couple of winters, she has taken up snowboarding. She has a couple of tatoos and a belly button ring.
It's a wonder I don't drink more.
Friday arrived and I tried not to think about it. Tried not to watch the clock and imagine her and her friend getting their instructors and their parachutes.
She was good enough to call me after it was all over to reassure old mom here that she was still among the living.
And she wouldn't promise me that she wouldn't do it again.
I love her. And that's the parent's dilemma. We want our children independent. We want them to think for themselves, to pursue their interests, to explore the world around them. I celebrate the good parenting that that involves. I've tried my hardest to abide by it.
But, dammit, I didn't see anything in the fine print about skydiving!
Posted by Darleen at October 6, 2004 05:42 PM
Comments
Uh oh. I went skydiving when I was 21. Now I know how my mom felt. (she wasn’t happy about it, but I only told her about it afterwards)
Statistically, skydiving isn’t awfully dangerous – and with the right kind of training it’s a lot of fun. The only thing that’s a problem is 'BASE jumping' (jumping off of buildings & hills in unsupervised conditions). That’s too dumb for words.
Posted by: mary at October 7, 2004 11:25 AM
Mary
Intellectually, I know that skydiving (like getting on an airplane) is much safer than tons of other activities. Probably even safer than snowboarding.
Emotionally? I'm the mom in A Christmas Story saying "You'll shoot your eye out."
Posted by: Darleen at October 7, 2004 12:18 PM
I don't have kids, but I sympathize.
You have some reason for pride in her bravery, though. My mom was a pilot, and I was always kind of proud of that.
Sometimes it's good to give Death the finger and jump out of an airplane. With a good 'chute, of course.
Hey, why not go with her? You'll love it, and I promise you won't die.
"A Christmas Story" is one of the best movies ever.
Posted by: Binacontenda at October 8, 2004 09:06 PM
Scott
It's just not my thing. I love snow skiing, I love roller coasters, I love swimming in the ocean (I tried surfing, just didn't get the hang of it).
Hey, agreed on Christmas Story! What's not to love about the story of the Major Prize and the Bumpus dogs??? :-)
See, there are some things we DO agree on!
Oh...and major kudos to your mom!
PS. My eldest daughter is a paramedic (going to nursing school for her RN come spring). She, too, does a job I have pride in, can be dangerous at times, and one I wouldn't chose for myself. But I'm damned proud of her.
Posted by: Darleen at October 8, 2004 09:30 PM